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Fun fact: I can play the guitar. But I haven’t since I was eleven and the other day my mum said ‘Oh, yeah, my old guitar’s in the garage if you want to mess about with it’, so naturally I was like ‘Yeah!’, thinking I could re-teach myself.

Here’s the thing:

My mum’s guitar has not been played since 1981.

Here’s another thing:

If you don’t tune guitars regularly, they tend to sound… Well, a bit rubbish.

So in conclusion:

Tune it first, or it will shreds your eardrums and probably enjoy doing so.

Oh, and by the way:

Go gently on the strings. If they’re old, they snap. While you’re playing. Stinging your fingers as they do so.

In history, we had to look at workhouse records and I found one for a girl called Elizabeth Jones. She was sixteen and ended up in there in the mid-1800s. Her ‘reason for entry’ was listed as ‘Bad Girl’. A few months later, she managed to sneak off and run away and they never heard from her again. She just ran for it. Not a single fuck given. Probably carried on doing whatever it was that got her thrown into the workhouse. We should all aspire to be as cool as Elizabeth Jones.

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